I dont know what is happening

I didnt feel his presence. I didnt feel it at all. I dont know why. Today, really sucks for me.. I have been quiet the whole day and i zone out myself just now. I didnt feel like praying but knowing that he will be there for you and i wanted to be new person. Seeing Wei Chen, Kailin & Jane brightened up my day for a moment.

It's sooo hard for me to try to please them and also myself. I feel like i want to give up. I feel like im in a situation that i really cant take it anymore and i really want to give up. I cant take up any his challenge anymore. Im really hurting inside but i dare not show the people ard me.

I dare not tell the memebers of E316 that i want to give up. That im really hurting inside. That i cant take this anymore. I dare not tell my Shatec friends that even though i love baking alot but i get to stress when im confused. I have not told my parents that i go for cell grp and church services coz i have no idea how to start up the subject with them. I dare not tell my parents that i need help in my school work. That i failed another of my subject and i have no idea how am i going to study for it. That im soooo scared for this term coz there are sooo much theory to study and it really hard for me.

I dare tell him that im hurting alot inside coz he knows and i dare not pray for myself coz i will feel bad so i rather pray for my friends and those ard me and then i will feel good.

I really dont know what is happening.
Sorry
xoxo
Tash