Getting To Know Myself Better

Can I explode myself

2009-10-25T22:26:00.004+08:00

I haven been myself lately coz i have been feeling down. I dont really show coz thats just me. Im pretty upset with myself coz i haven been reading the bible, praying, talking to HIM and at the end of the day, i most of the time feel very very bad.

Then there's Yiling whom i love alot coz she's someone whom talks about trying to get to know God but i feel scared of her and whenever she says that she wants to talk to me, i get all stressed up coz i felt that i didnt reach to her expectations or i did something wrong. Then she gave me this card last week and i was curious and am still am curious why she gave me the card but until now i dared not ask her why.

Then there's the cell grp. i didnt fellowship with them for 2 weeks coz i want to go home early and not dissappoint my parents. Also coz i didnt feel like going anyway. Also didnt want to go today coz i have to meet up with Pit, Kar & Koon to buy ribbons but i end going for fellowship and its all thanks to Lucas.

Today, was pretty high after Ravi pass me the card to pass to Lucas but end of service, i cried thanks to Lucas but end up laughing. haha

Lucas knew quite some time ago that i like Ravi but there was something that he told me which i some how is losing hope for it since the time i heard about it. Ravi seems to like someone and i feel like i dont have a chance anymore.

Part of me is telling me to give up and focus on school and think that you probably wont get married at all. Other part of me is still like him but dont think to far that he might be yours one day. Just like him from afar.

Have been trying my very best to help Wei Kian not to think negative about life but somehow i feel that i didnt do my best coz i was in a situation myself and if i cant help myself why did i even bother helping people. Tash is useless.

Then there's Ben. I dont even know what is his freaking problem. Why do i have to be the one who have to go thru and f***ing racist thingy. What was his problem about messaging all in capital. He dont have to put his anger on others. I HATE guys like that.

Im already hating my dad and i dont want to hate anyone else but i feel like im left with no choice. I just want to stop trying. ARGH!!!!!!

Maybe you guys should stop praying for me coz God already gave up on me. Im just another useless sinner.

Michael JacksonTribute

2009-10-10T22:42:00.036+08:00

EDWARD MOSS IS HOTTTTT!!!!

Here are all the videos..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UL7n1zaLLnY

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FF6oh1t7kyc

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ihiNR8gacjA

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ku-qTevo0wU

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WmSCt75i0NI

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XiAh0SzvzPU

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iY1GwqDILO8

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H4D6Bt6po38

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4TcsldSCivY

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sCbz5HFdecU

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fOdQDfn4YK4

My past 2 weeks in Production

2009-10-10T09:53:00.017+08:00

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Banana Muffins

2009-09-25T00:19:00.004+08:00

Today, i made banana muffins for my mum's friends. The first 2 pics were the first try and it was a little dry. The 3 & 4 pic were better.

Enjoy!!!

Muffins

2009-09-23T18:22:00.005+08:00

Today, i made muffins. Overall, i felt the frosting should me stronger, like slightly harder and then it should be eaten once ready. The base, i guess had too much oil so have slightly of the oil after taste but yeah, it was a success. The pics might not look that clear.

Stop trying/fighting

2009-09-21T20:48:00.002+08:00

I didnt want to get involved in the first place but you put in the position that now i really cant take it anymore. All i hear you complain about other people but yourself. Everyone around you done wrong except you.

You complain about her buying the wrong food and not even telling you. But about you?? Have you ever bought the food that we like. Did you ever know what is our fave food? NO right?? You think that you own this house, this world, this life. BUT NO!!!

You are starting to make me hate you again. I used to hate you ALOT but i did try my best to forgive you over and over again. WHY do i have such a person like you in my life??? WHY WHY WHY???

BBQ - after my exam (19 September 2009)

2009-09-20T21:18:00.002+08:00

Yesterday, after our exams, we had BBQ at Siew Koon's place. The BBQ was to celebrate that exams are finally over and we wont be seeing each other much for the next term and also our little gathering.

YES, i had lots of fun. We each can bring a boyfriend or a friend and since, i didnt have one, i brought Samuel. Felix came too.. Hehehe. Only Mandie's boyfriend didnt come because he had to work but yeah, overall all of us had fun.

Pics will be up soon ya :D

EXAMS!!! (part 2)

2009-09-20T21:08:00.002+08:00

17 September 2009
Today, fel sick. Couldt think much because i was having fever and my runny nose haven recovered. I felt that i didnt do well for that paper but also felt that i did my best.

p.s. Happy Birthday Iftitah. (lost contact with him but still remembers his birthday)

18 September 2009
Wow, this papaer was really SUPER confusing. I seriously have no idea what answer does she wants from me. Certain questions took me like 3 to 4 times to read but still dont understand.

p.s. Happy Birthday Xin Ping (also lost contact with this friend)

19 September 2009
This paper was pretty ok but there was one of this question that i left blank because i couldnt think anymore but i know that i got study for that. Plus, it was 2 marks for it. I really didnt want to give up but i couldnt get the answer.

p.s. Happy Birthday Nana (I totally forgot to wish her but i wished her today, 20 September 2009)

8 done, 1 more to go and then EXAMS are over!!!

EXAMS!!!!

2009-09-16T17:03:00.003+08:00

14 September 2009
In the morning had IT exam which wasnt that bad, quite ok. In the afternoon had Implement Marketing Strategies was pretty confusing.

15 September 2009
In the morning had Monitor Income & Expenses was worse plus i didnt manage to finish my paper.

16 Septemeber 2009
In the morning had Comm Skill had so many SAQ and i only had like 20 mins to do my T/F, MCQ & matching questions. I took like 1 hour 10 mins to do my SAQ. In the afternoon had my Western Prep, overall was ok but i couldnt answer those question that which needs explaination.

5 exams done and 4 more to go!!!
Good Luck to me!!!

My Interview Results

2009-09-09T09:12:00.004+08:00

Firstly, wanna thank God for making all of this possible. I had some confidence in me which im happy about it. Even after the interview, i felt such a great relieve that it was over but i also felt happy because, i felt that i done my best and that im happy about it.

Secondly, wanna thank my friends whom has helped me in the interview questions and the history of the hotel, the night before and i was able to get everything into my head in the morning. Was pretty happy becasue i didnt let my fear took over me.

Thirdly, wanna say YAY!!! Because i scored 41/50 for my interview results!!! Thanks everyone!!!

this video brought me to tears

2009-09-06T16:30:00.001+08:00

Being random

2009-09-06T16:28:00.001+08:00

When a girl is quiet, millions of things are running in her mind.

When a girl is not arguing, she is thinking deeply.

When a girl looks at you with eyes full of questions, she is wondering how long you will be around.

When a girl answers “I’m fine” after a few seconds, she is not at all fine.

When a girl stares at you, she is wondering why you are lying.

When a girl lies on your chest, she is wishing for you to be hers forever.

When a girl calls you everyday, she is seeking for your attention.

When a girl says “I love you”, she means it with all her heart.

When a girl says that she can’t live without you, she has made up her mind that you are her future.

When a girl says “I miss you”, no one in this world can miss you more than that.

Thank God

2009-09-05T23:04:00.003+08:00

Thank God for the hardest and the worst project that is finally presented and gone forever. It took alot of my time, days, weeks and i have to even ask Justin & Aaron for help and Lucas too for helping me find all the possible information for the licenses which i want to thank them from the bottom of my heart sooo much for it.

Thank God, that since it was over, i felt relieved and can finally breathe again. On the day of my presentation, i received a message from Aaron saying that he won 2nd prize for his photo and he got 2k. I was like over the top and i was feeling happy for him.. OMG!!! I couldnt believe!!!

Thank God, yesterday i reached home slightly late and that my dad didnt scold or make noise. That i was able to fellowship with them which i haven been doing but im glad i did yesterday.

Thank God, that today i managed to go and watch a movie with Aaron, Ben & Si Jie which was fun and also thank Ben for planning it.

Thank God that even though, i have been coming home late the past few days but i have limit myself to come home before 9pm but also get to spent time with my friends and also with Yiling & Si Jie during the house hunting and also with Aaron, Yiling & Si Jie during Aaron's birthday.

Thank God for making all of this possible!!!

Mission Accomplish!!! YAY!!!

2009-09-02T10:35:00.003+08:00

It was Yiling's mini idea that we decided to go house hunting. To Lucas's house to David's house to Kailin's house.

Giving them present and letters for thanks us being our teacher for teaching us such interesting things and also all the advices that really help us.

It was pretty tiring but fun as well coz we also get to fellowship more with each other.

YAY!!! Mission Accomplish!!!
Tash

RIP Nazmi & Mamat

2009-08-30T17:48:00.003+08:00

Ok, i will start with what i can remember so far

25 August 2009
Received a message from Alisyah saying that Nazmi passed away. Couldnt believe, thinking it was a prank message. Tried scrolling down but couldnt. Called her up and asked her about it and she told me she heard from Hudah.

Called Apai and asked him about it and she told me that Mamat also died. I couldnt believe. It's not just good friend but 2 good friends. OMG!!! How was i supposed to take it? It's just too much for me!!!

When for Nazmi's funeral and but didnt go to the place where they bury the body. Everything is just to fast for me. These days, whenever im passing near the road and a motorbike passes me, it just remind me of Nazmi's & Mamat.

May they Rest In Peace and that may God forgive them of all their sins. Im already missing you guys soooo much and the one thing that i treasure the most is the things that you left for me which is memories and i treasure every single one of it. You guys will forever be in my heart.

18 August 2009

2009-08-18T18:51:00.003+08:00

Today, also one of those days that is not very good. Got the news from Chef Goh saying that those who got either C or D will have to retake the exam and since it is a practical test, i have to pay extra more. I dont have much left and im wondering how am i going to pay.

I cant afford to tell my parents coz i dont want another lecture and then i wont be attending cell grp and church. I dont know what else to do. I even cried in class just now coz i couldnt believe that i did that bad in my practical class so much so that i failed.

You know something??

I always feel inferior when im with Pipit, Siew Koon, Karylan, Mandie & Deborah. Yes, they are smart but i feel that im on level 1 and they are on level 5 and i cant catch up with them coz im slow, i have this difficutly in getting stuffs into my brain and i can admit that im not that smart.

Its just really hard for me to cope but im trying my very best to climb up to the level that they are but every time, i try to, i even up either missing a step or short of a step which made me have negative thinking about myself that I AM STUPID!!!

I end up either crying for not being smart or hurting myself which kind of made me feel better for awhile. *lost of words*

17 August 2009

2009-08-18T18:35:00.002+08:00

I met Aili, Hong Poh & Bernice at the mrt station and we were all going to school. When we crossed to the middle of the road, Hong Poh suddenly turned around and when i turned around, he already crossed the road the the old lady fell down coz it was slippery and it was drizzling.

Aili also crossed and my heart just drop and i was just stunned for a moment. Bernice and i crossed to help too. After helping her crossed the road, all the way till i reached school, i was like shaking. I think its coz when i see the old lady fell.

School wasnt that fun coz i got back my results for Comm Skill and when i got back the paper, i looked at my marks and i just threw the paper on the table and said that i didnt like my marks. Pipit looked at me and asked me how much i got and i showed her my results.

My mentor was saying that those who got 30 were lucky and i thought to myself, 30 lucky?? I thought the passing mark was 25 and when i looked back to check how much was the total marks, i saw that it was 60 and i was like thinking what is half of 60.

Shockingly, i didnt know the answer and had to ask Pipit. She told me that it 30 and i told her that i failed. OMG!!!! I didnt know that i would do sooo badly. I felt stupid for the rest of the day.

I even got back my transcript and the worst thing was that half the class got either C or D for their Elborate Sweets. The unexpected people got B for Elborate Sweets which is why most of us cant understand.

After class, went down to Chef Goh and she said she thought everyone pass and she said that maybe it was a mistake. She said that she will let us know tomorrow.

Tash is :(

16 August 2009

2009-08-16T20:41:00.002+08:00

Today, i went to Pipit's church which is at 81 King's Drive opposite Nanyang Kindergarden. I think it was pretty good. I did see a different side of another church and i also made new friends.

After that, went to meet my cell group at Orchard Central. Spent some time with them before we departed. Accompained Yiling & Si Jie to Plaza Sing and they were supposed to do their assignment but we ended up chatting the whole 2 hours.

Had great time with them and trying to know them more and better and they knowing me better and more which i find it good. I really want more of this and cant wait to see them next at cell group.

14 August 2009

2009-08-15T19:47:00.002+08:00

Cell group was slightly different. Lucas prayed for each and every one of us and i felt God presence. I didnt really understand what HE was showing me coz i not see blue squares and i felt that HE was pushing me. But pushing me to where, I have no idea. I really want to know more.

13 August 2009

2009-08-15T19:44:00.002+08:00

Thursday's excrusion was pretty fun.. We not only get to know the good wines but also it's like extra hours for us after school. My teacher, Mr Jason sounded more like a wine promotor than a teacher to us. A lady even thought of that too, which was pretty funny.

Had fun after beverage class with Mr Jason

2009-08-12T20:57:00.002+08:00

After beverage class, we get to try the different alcohol like Whiskty, Buterscortch, Hazelnut, Rum.. Alot of stuff. We are going on a field trip with him tomorrow to know more about the different wines. YAY!!! It's gonna be fun!!!

This is what i get

2009-08-11T20:13:00.001+08:00

I didnt have the mood to study and i was only flipping pages and i couldnt do mist of the short answer questions. Boo hoo hoo, blame it on my own mistake. :(

Im trying hard to change

2009-08-09T22:31:00.001+08:00

Today, service was great but when i enter into Church today, i felt the sense of regret and unforgiven and the only part that i struggle with was when Wei Chen asked me whether my sins were forgiven and i couldnt give him an answer coz there were sins that i cant forgive myself and i dont think that HE will forgive me. Even, if HE forgive me, i feel that i dont deserve.

God presence was there but i couldnt feel him and im drying to feel his presence again. I really want to feel his presence coz i haven been feeling his presence for quite long already.

Festival Of Praise Day 1 (31 July 2009)

2009-08-01T20:48:00.002+08:00

It was my first time going for such an event and it was really an awesome event coz i have never experience such a huge thing where the atmosphere was really unbelievable. It's like the first time i step into City Harvest.

The crowd was great and even the officers that check your bags were friendly. Church friends, i went with were awesome too. Really sang to the extend that i cough almost throughout the whole event but the end of the day, i really did enjoyed myself and that what matters the most.

Cant wait for tomorrow's service which is also going to be a great one and i will update more on it ya.

xoxo
Tash

I dont know what is happening

2009-07-25T00:50:00.002+08:00

I didnt feel his presence. I didnt feel it at all. I dont know why. Today, really sucks for me.. I have been quiet the whole day and i zone out myself just now. I didnt feel like praying but knowing that he will be there for you and i wanted to be new person. Seeing Wei Chen, Kailin & Jane brightened up my day for a moment.

It's sooo hard for me to try to please them and also myself. I feel like i want to give up. I feel like im in a situation that i really cant take it anymore and i really want to give up. I cant take up any his challenge anymore. Im really hurting inside but i dare not show the people ard me.

I dare not tell the memebers of E316 that i want to give up. That im really hurting inside. That i cant take this anymore. I dare not tell my Shatec friends that even though i love baking alot but i get to stress when im confused. I have not told my parents that i go for cell grp and church services coz i have no idea how to start up the subject with them. I dare not tell my parents that i need help in my school work. That i failed another of my subject and i have no idea how am i going to study for it. That im soooo scared for this term coz there are sooo much theory to study and it really hard for me.

I dare tell him that im hurting alot inside coz he knows and i dare not pray for myself coz i will feel bad so i rather pray for my friends and those ard me and then i will feel good.

I really dont know what is happening.
Sorry
xoxo
Tash

Mandie's birthday

2009-07-23T10:15:00.011+08:00

Siew Koon, Pipit, Deborah, Karylan & me made cupcake for Mandie for her birthday.

xoxo
Tash

Finally!!!

2009-07-22T20:22:00.001+08:00

Finally, i have decided to open back my blog once again!!!
Do check out ya!!!
xxx

Swimming, Suana, Tasty Soup, Tampines, Car, Dimsum, Beach

2009-03-31T22:30:00.070+08:00

We had alot of fun and im really thakful have this kind of friends!!!
I love you girls!!!

Just thought of hanging out with ASHLEY & MEIHUI @ Kane's place

2009-03-30T10:58:00.030+08:00

Darren & Ashley

Darren & me

Darren & Qing

Deborah & Ashley

Deborah, Darren, Kane, & Qing

Deborah, Kane, Darren & Qing

Kane & Ashley

Kane & Qing

Kane, me & Ashley

Kane, Meihui & Ashley

me & Ashley

Meihui & Darren

Qing & Meihui

Qing, Darren & Deborah

Qing, Kane, Deborah & Darren

The BEST thing was knowing Ashley & Meihui and getting along with them very well.

Presentation Day - 21 March 2009

2009-03-30T10:12:00.028+08:00

Siew Koon, Deborah, Qing, Miss Lin, Karylan & Mandie

Deborah & me

Deborah, me, Kane & Qing

Kane & Deborah

Kane & Qing

Qing

Qing & Deborah

Qing & me

Samuel, Hong Poh, Avian, Vaan, Kane & Darren

After Presentation went over to Kane's place and i didnt think of overnighting and i did.. I wasnt that lucky this time coz my dad wasnt that happy and i got scolded from him the next day.

I really had fun from the time i steped into class till sunday morning. One of the unexpected thing that Qing did was she threw her boyfriend ring in the pool and it took us like 2 hours to find that ring and it was Qing who found it. She said, "If i could find the ring it means fate." I was like, "Huh? You do really believe in that?"

By the time we were out of the pool, it was already 3am. We went to shower while Kane made something for us to eat before we slept. Deborah, Qing and i slept in his room while Kane slept in the living room. Felt kinda bad that we occupy him room and he had to sleep in the living room.

The next morning, we woke up pretty early like around 7 plus but went back to sleep and finally woke up at 9 plus. Deborah's mum was calling so only brushed our teeth and left. We didnt even bother showering.

I reached home and thinking that i might get scolded form my dad from the time i reached home, but when i reached home, he wasnt at home and that made it even worse coz i had to wait till he come home and then i get scolded from him which is like 4 plus in the afternoon.

He was like saying, "Who is more important? Your friends or your studies? If you think its your friends, that you should just pack your things and move in with them, dont bother going to school anymore." I really wanted to go that time but i knew that i didnt want to bother my friends with me satying over at their place and be like free loader. So i just tahan and stay.

I knoew that if i stay, i dont have much time to spent with my friends, i cant come home late and i might not be able to overnight. My friends are my TOP priority and they mean the world to me. Its them who knows me bttere than i know myself. Its them who made me who i am today and its them who i feel loved, secure and save whenever im with them. I feel like myself and i can do whatever i want.

Photo Taking - 18 March 2009

2009-03-30T00:46:00.042+08:00

Adrianna & Tommy

Adrianna, me & Lynn

Alvin & me

Alvin, Ppit, Song & Benny

Bernice, Adrianna, Pipit, Lynn & Sya

Darren & me

Deborah & Pipit

Felix & Pipit

Felix & me

Felix, Pipit, me & Qing

Group pic

Jiali & me

Kane & me

me & Deborah

me & Hong Poh

me & Ivy

me & Lynn

me, Hong Poh & Pipit

Nima & Qing

Nima, Hong Poh, Samuel & Tommy

Naima, Pipit, Hong Poh, Samuel & Tommy

Pipit, Karlyan & me

Pipit, Zhao Wen & me

Samuel & me

Tommy & Pipit

Qing, & Pipit

Zhao Wen & me

Overnight at Kane's place - 11 March 2009

2009-03-29T20:06:00.014+08:00

This was the day where i know that Aili was forcing me to go with her when i dont even want to go but i felt very bad coz i dont know how to tell her that i rather hanging out with Kane and friends than with her.

She wanted me to go to Zoosk with her, Vaan, Zhao Wen and some from A class. I dont want to go knowing that i cant even go coz my dad doesnt allow plus i have never step into a club before.

I made plans with Kane, Darren & Qing that i will hang out with them and i didnt want to break that plan. I didnt had a choice so i had to lie to Aili that i will be meeting my friend and that friend of mine is staying near Qing.

Qing wented to go to Wset Mall to buy some hair clips and then after that, i will follow her home to take some stuff before going over to Kane's house. I didnt know that Kane, Darren and Hong Poh were also accompanying Qing to West Mall and since Aili was there, she decided to follow us.

I was even more stressed coz she kept asking me and i kept turning her down. In the shop, she kept asking me that i was dragging myself to walk with her and when Vaan called her on her phone, she wanted to talk to me and she said that if i didnt go, then she wouldnt go and that made me feel even more bad coz why izzit becasue of me you guys all dont want to go.

I didnt know what else to say so i pass the phone back to Aili and i walked out of the shop. I seriously didnt know what else to say and i simply walked passed Kane knowing that he was there. Kane came and asked if i was ok and i nearly broke down in tears in front of him.

Kane was DAMN good in comforting others and i kinda feeling better after he talked to me. Qing finished and she knew that something was wrong with me coz she saw the expression on me and she held my hand. I needed that. Thanks Qing!!!

We were on the train Darren, Qing, Kane, me, Aili & Hong Poh. I didnt want to bother Aili so i just listen to Qing, Darren and Kane chatting and Aili kept showing me clothes that she is going to wear to Zoosk and that she will choose clothes for me too. I dont know how to get it to her head that i didnt want to go and everytime i tried she just wouldnt accept the answer "NO". Kane held on to my hand and he asked if i was ok and i said that i wasnt.

Kane & Darren got off at Yishun since Darren is going straight to Kane's house. Since i told Aili that my friend is staying near Qing, i was actually going to Qing's place and Hong Poh was staying few floors above Qing.

We got off at AMK and took bus to Qing's place which is at Serangoon North. Qing knew everything that happen coz i told her along the way and i also received a message from Kane saying, "dont feel so bad kay :D if you dont come it's alright, dont pressure yourself too much."

I replied saying, "Thanks for his care but i will still come." I knew he care, he care about everyone that is good to him. Went to Qing place, pretty nice and she took the stuff that she needed and share with me alot of stuff and also met her dad as well. I never expect that i would be such good friends with her.

After that, we went over to Kane's place. Took 169 from AMK interchange and the funny part was that we over shot the bus stop soooo much that we didnt realise till Kane called Qing and said that we over shot.

OMG!!! We got down the next bus stop and took the same bus, 169 from the opposite direction and few stops after we boarded, Guoqing boarded the bus and we were like, hey its such a concidence. he was like, what the heck were we doing in the bus and we told him that we over shot. Hahaha.. We finally got down at the correct bus stop and Kane and Darren came to pick us up halfway.

Went to Kane's place and hang out. Pretty fun. I didnt thought of overnighting at his place. Went to have dinner at a nearby prata shop and then went to see stars at Seletar. By the time, we managed to relax, it was already coming to 9pm and i was supposed to go by then but we just came and sat down and i didnt want to leave either.

So i made a call to tell my dad that i would be staying over at my friend's place and that the next day, my morning class is cancel. I was pretty lucky for that day coz he said ok and i feel like such a huge relieved and i was happy.

Darren and Guoqing went to look for one of their friend who was coming and it was left with me, Kane & Qing and i asked Kane a favour that i needed his address and he was type his address and he was like saying are you staying over and i was said, "yeah."

I didnt expect that i would stay over but yeah, i did and im glad i did coz i had fun. When we went back, Darren and Guoqing were in the pool with their clothes on. After playing in the pool which was around 10 plus, Guoqing had to go coz he had school the next day and so Darren sent him to take cab.

Me, Qing and Darren stayed over and Kane's place. We chatted and laughed and i had fun even knowing that i had class the next morning.

Qing & me

Qing & Kane

me, Qing, Kane, Darren & Guoqing

Kane & me

Guoqing, Darren & Kane

Darren, Qing, me & Kane

Darren, Qing & Kane

Darren, me, Qing & Kane

Darren, me & Kane

Darren & me

Vaan's god bro's wedding - 7 March 2009

2009-03-29T19:50:00.021+08:00

Edward & me

Zhao Wen, Pipit, me, Vaan, & Aili

Zhao Wen, Pipit, me & Aili

Zhao Wen & me

Zhao Wen & Aili

Timonthy, Marcus, me, Pipit, Zhao Wen, Edward & Aili

Pipit, Vaan, Aili, me & Zhao Wen

Pipit & Zhao Wen

Pipit & Edward

me, Aili & Pipit

me & Pipit

group pic with Bride & Groom

Vaan's hse - 19 Feb 2009

2009-03-29T19:39:00.009+08:00

Vaan, Dani, Pipit & me

Vaan's family

Dani, Pipit, me & Vaan

Dani & Pipit

Dani & me

Vaan invited us to her place to try her mum's cooking and it was DAMN nice lor..

2 March 2009

2009-03-04T06:04:00.002+08:00

Jiali decided to watch a movie and she asked me, Pipit & Ai Li whether we are free after school and i said that i should be fine if my project group doesnt have anything on.

After school, the 4 girls were confirm going and we decided to meet Vaan first before going coz she was coming down just to see us and not go for IS. When she came, we decided to ask her along coz Ai Li said that Kane was going too but Hong Poh cant.

We went to eat first at this Japanese restaurant which i have never heard it before but it was nice. We went to watch a movie, *He s Just Not Into You* The funny part during the movie was that, me and Vaan were like chatting and Ai Li was busy messaging and Kane just suddenly disappered. He actually went to the other side to sleep.

I couldnt stand having an empty seat beside me so i asked Vaan to call Kane to come back and he did. I lay my head my Kane shoulder and i almost slept during the show. Haha.. I wasnt paying much attention to the show. In fact, i was having a great time with my friends.

After the movie which ended at 7pm, the sky looks pretty bright. It didnt even look like it was 7pm. lol!! Ai Li had to go for work and Vaan was asking us whether we wanted to go. I didnt want to go but it seems that i didnt have a choice coz Vaan and Ai Li were dragging me to come.

Pipit didnt go so it was only Vaan, Jiali, Kane, Ai Li & me. When we reached there, i saw the place and i didnt really like it. I didnt like the environment. I didnt even want to step in but coz of them, i did. When we sat down, i was holding on to Vaan and was shaking and Vaan was asking me whether i was cold and i said that, i not cold. Actually, i was feeling hot inside. I think i was pretty tense up coz i have never step into a pub b4 or maybe its the environment.

We didnt even spent like an hour there and we left. Jiali, Vaan & me shared a cab while Kane when home by himself. Interesting day!!!

Photos coming soon!!!

pics that have been long delayed

2009-03-01T14:18:00.052+08:00

Siew Koon, Ivy & me after project

Tash was bored

Pipit was bored

Pipit

Balcony

Siew Koon aka Ah Ma

Pipit, me & Siew Koon

Jiali, me & Deborah

3 of us

Pipit, me & Ai Li

Pipi, Ai Li & me

Pipit & me

Felix, Pipit, me, Ai Li, Deborah & Siew Koon

Felix, Pipit, me Jiali, Deborah & Siew Koon

Blue Coral
I drank 2 different types of drink

Screaming Orgasm

Blended Margarita (Ai Li drink)

Felix, Pipi, me, Ai Li, Deborah, Siew Koon & Jiali

Vaan & Dani

The Pastry Kitchen

My Class

Ivy, Darren & Ai Li

Hong Poh, Kane, Ai Li, Darren & Edward

Hong Poh & Darren

Felix & Siew Koon aka Ah Ma

Darren, me & Deborah

Darren, Hong Poh & Miss Goh

Dareen & Ivy

Just the 3 of us

This was taken after we had Astons

This was taken after we watched a movie and were queuing up for Astons

We went to watch a movie called Benjamin Buttons

Ben & Jerry

My birthday treat from Ai Li, Pipit, Jiali & Annie

What have been happening?!?!?!

2009-02-15T22:38:00.018+08:00

9 Feb 2009
I actually, thought of going over to Pipit place to hang out with her but she had plans and i thought of wanting to hang out with Ai Li but she had her projcet plans too.

I was bored so i thought of going to Phoon Huat and luckily Jiali was free so she accomapnied me there. I wanted to see how the place look like and what are the stuff there sell there.

Was glad that i went there. I even had lunch with Jiali at a nearby coffee shop and we sat there chatting till 4 plus. Was really a great chatting time with Jiali. Later at right Hong Poh message me that class for 10 feb is starting at 9am and i couldnt believe it.

Message him back and we continued messaging and the best part i found out was that his project group who had Kane, Darren, Edward and including him was there at Ai Li place supposed to do project but swam at her pool instead and shocking part was that Edward took out his shirt and swam too and i wasnt there to see it. OMG!!!!!!

I told Hong Poh, how come he didnt invite me and he said that it will be pretty weird coz only their group memebers plus Ai Li group memebers were there and it would be weird for me plus they didnt had a place to do their project so they had last min plans to go Ai Li place..

I called Pipit up and told her about it and she was laughing throughout coz she knows that i like Edward and she also likes when i talk about Edward!!!! You should have really seen my expression when Hong Poh told me that!!!!

10 Feb 2009
Went for class and Hong Poh kept on teasting me and saying that if i wanted to see the photo i will have to pay $2 and only for a glance!!!! Thats like robbing me, haha!!! Ai Li also told me that she got special information and if i wanted to know about it, i will have to pay her $5 and i told her its like robbing the bank!!! haha!!!!

Throughout the whole day, they have been teasing me and i really had a good time in IS class!!!! Class ended early so Ai Li, Hong Poh, Kane and me went to West Mall and then we hang out outside the mrt station being crazy for awhile before going in and we sat down as the train keep passing and we did not board any. We kept on saying, Next one, next one but we didnt till we met Vaan, Dani and Zhao Wen and we boarded the train with them.

We sat in the last cabin and Vaan started singing and it was VERY funny and there was one guy in front of us and his expresion on his face looks like he thinks we are all crazy. Haha!!! I had fun!!!!

11 Feb 2009
I didnt want to go back so early so i waited for Ai Li and gang at the station. When they came, i was pretty shocked to see Edward too and i seriously thought that he was coming too. Since Kane wanted bubble tea so we waited for him and Edward asked me why i didnt want to go back and i told him that my home has problem and i didnt want to get involved in it.

I asked him if he was coming with us and he said that he cant coz he had to go elsewhere. We also me Bernice and friends there too and we chatted with them till Kane was done. After Kane was done, we left together with Edward but he didnt take the train with us.

Hong Poh, Ai Li, Kane and me went to Bishan coz Ai Li wanted to look for and job and they also wanted to accompined me as they know that i didnt want to go home yet. They are really such nice friends and i am really thankful for that.

12 Feb 2009
Nothing much really happen but i told Pipit what happen and she is always ever ready to listen to my stories and im glad i have a friend like her.

13 feb 2009
Ai Li and i were supposed to go Bugis but we change our minds and went to Kane house instead coz Deborah wanted to make cookies and so Ai Li, Siew Koon, Deborah and I went to Kane house. Edward was supposed to come but he changed his mind last minute.

Reached Kane house and Siew Koon and i couldnt believe that Kane room is a bomb shelter. Kane place has a really nice swimming pool which is as nice and Pipit place.

I really had fun at Kane place even though for a moment Kane saw that i was bored and he kept on saying that he was sorry that his house really got nothing to do but i didnt blame him at all and told him that it wasnt his fault and he needc not say sorry.

I felt that i really bonded alot with Ai Li and im glad that happen coz she and Pipit are my BEST friends and i didnt expect that i would make BEST friends in Shatec.

It was really an interesting, fun and bonded day for me and im am really thankful for all of this!

14 Feb 2009
HAPPY VALENTINE DAY!!!!!!!
Edward was late for class and i seriously thought that he wasnt coming for class. I really wanted to wish him Happy Valentine! Dani received Roses from her boyfriend. This man came into our class and was saying that he was sorry that he interupted our class and that he was looking for Kim and i was thinking, who is Kim and i say that Dani liftedup her hand and went to collect the roses.

WOW!!!! Her boyfriend is really DAMN good and sweet and romantic!!! Aww, Ai Li and i wish that we had a boyfriend like Dani!!!! We planed last minute that Ai Li, Pipit, Jiali, Felix and i will have lunch and that Jiali will introduced us a place to eat.

Jiali is really a DAMN excellent person coz she knows like the BEST places where they have great and awesome food in Singapore and me leaving in Singapore for 21 years have no idea about it.. How bad can i be huh????

I really had fun time with my friends and im already missing them!!! I cant wait to see them on Monday.

Thank you Lord for such a great week!!!!

6 Feb 2008

2009-02-06T23:03:00.002+08:00

Today we had test during IS class and im pretty happy that i kind of did well in it. I really glad that i did better than the other time.

After IS class, Jiali, Annie, Siew Koon, Pipit, Hong Poh, Ai Li, Edward and me went for a movie at the The Cathy and we watched Benjamin Buttons which was i very nice and sad movie but it was abit too long.

After that, we went to eat at Astons and i have never been to that place before, not mentionin never heard of that restaurant before but the food there was ok but the prices there were abit too pricey.

I had fun even though Edward and i were only friends and we were only sticking as friends but im glad to have a friend like him and we will still hang out but only as friends. Abit upset that we didnt have much to talk about but im fine so dont worry about me.

Will try to get the pics from Ai Li soon!!!
Thank you for a wonderful and great time and awesome day!!!
Tash :)

We took during IS class, 5 Feb 2009

2009-02-05T22:13:00.027+08:00

Ai Li, Darren, Pipit, Kane & me

Bernice, Lynn, Pipit & Syahirah

Darren, Ivy, & me

Darren & me

Darren & Kane

Darren & me

Darren & Xueqing

Deborah & me

Hong Poh, Ai Li, Darren, Pipit, Jiali, me, Deborah & Kane

Ivy & me

Ivy & Pipit

Jiali, Pipit & Annie

Karylan, Darren, Ivy, Pipit, Deborah, Ai Li, Kame & me

Mandie & me

Pipit & Darren

Pipit & me

Pipit & Syahirah

Pipit, Deborah & me

Syahirah & Bernice

Xueqing & Pipit

Xueqing & Darren

Xueqing, Karylan, Pipit & Mandie

I am trying...

2009-02-04T17:15:00.002+08:00

Yesterday, i wasnt in the good mood. I was pretty sad earlier on and i didnt want to let affect me in IS but i was wrong. It really did affect me in IS and my butter cake didnt turn out well which made me even worse.

My butter cake was left outside for 15 - 20 minutes and no one wanted to put in for us. When i finished my sponge cake that's when my butter was just put inside and it was Jiali who put in for us.

Then Miss Goh was angry when my butter cake was put in together Jiali one coz hers was already half cook. I was cleaning my table and she came to me and ask me whether i'm from table 10 and i said, "Yes!"

At that moment, i knoew that something was wrong and scold me for putting my butter cake into the same oven as Jiali one and i told her that it wasnt me who put it and it was Jiali who put it in for me.

I didnt want to put the blame one Jiali coz i know that i will feel bad but Jiali said that she will take the blame coz she was at fault and i really felt bad. Miss Goh told Jiali that mine cant put in the same oven as hers coz mine might sink and its not a good thing.

In the end, mine and Mr Song one sank but Edward and Lynn one didnt sink which made me a bit confused for awhile. Then i was thinking that maybe we didnt mix the ingredients properly so that's why it turn out this way.

Everyone else was like, "Wow, whose is that?" I was sooo upset with myself and some of my classmates saw my sad look. Miss Goh said that my group butter cake sank can be either the ingredients not mix properly or we didnt measure the ingredients to the correct amount and also the oven timing.

I didnt blame my partner but i only blame myself coz i let my mood affect me which wasnt a good thing. After class ended, i went to toilet to change into my other set of clothes and i cried coz i wasp pretty upset.

At that moment, i really felt like a failure and i jsut felt like i couldnt take it. It was pretty hard and i felt that letting it out made me feel a little better. During lunch, friends like Pipit & Ai Li were really SUPER caring and comforting. During demo class, friends like Deborah, Siew Koon and Edward were really SUPER caring.

The bset thing was Kane. He was sooo nice that he gave me his butter cakqe to bring home. I really felt that i made the right choice of friends which i am proud to have them. I tried to keep my spirit up and try to be stronger.

Overnight @ Ai Li place

2009-02-03T20:35:00.030+08:00

Aili invited us to her house and if some of us wanted to overnight there, we could coz we didnt have the morning class the next day. I met up with Siew Koon and Annie and Bishan station. We went to buy some drinks and tibits and then took the bus number 410G to her place, which was the stop after Thomson Plaza.

When we arrived there, most of the guys were already there and already started playing poker. Aili brought us, girls up to her room and we sat there and chatted while waiting for the others to come. At around 7:30pm, Aili said, *Come lets have dinner*

We all went to the prata house and we had alot of fun there eating, chatting and even taking pictures. After dinner, Siew Koon, Vaan, Deborah and me went to buy liquior at Thomson Plaza, NTUC. We took quite a long time there and in the end the others came too.

After that, Annie, Pipit, Zhao Wen and me went back first coz we were walking in the front and when we turn around, we couldnt find the others so headed back first. Edward and Avian were at the house and waited for the others to come back.

When the others came back some of us decided to play poker while others decided to swim in the swimming pool. Kane has an awesome body and he wears Aili shorts and when hes in the pool, he just look soooo cute!!!

Some of them, couldnt stay longer, so they had to leave. I was watching Vaan, Darreen and Kane playing in the pool when Edward said that he had to leave. I actually, didnt want him to leave and he said *I was here ealier than you* I said, *Cant you like stay longer or maybe overnight?* He was like, *My dad coming to pick me up*

A few hours later, Vaan shouted saying that Edward won 4D and i went to her to see the number and she gave me the phone and the ticket and i was like looking at it and the number look different. I said *Vaan, did you see it properly?* She said that the other ticket was with Edward.

I went up to Aili room and i saw Avian SUPER high and he was laying on the matress with his phone music on. Darren was like listening to his own music and he gave me this drink and think i was cotton blue. I smelled it and it was SUPER strong and after taking 2 sips, i was very high.

Aili called Edward and put it on loudspeaker so that Darren and i could say hi to him. Edward said that he was coming over and most probably sneaking out in order to come. And he came!!!

We decided to shift our game from the living room to Aili room and some of us were playing blackjack. I was super high that i couldnt think and i asked Edward for help. Edward, was really a nice guy and indeed helpful. After playing for a few rounds, Vaan, Siew Koon and Deborah had to go and the remaining of us played In Between.

Playing In Between was pretty ok for me coz not only i didnt have to think much but also the high thingy were going off too.. I asked Edward for another drink and it was soooo sweet of him to get it for me. He is really a nice guy!!!

We also did take some pics and after the game, most of them went to bed. Edward, Zhao Wen, Hong Poh and i didnt sleep. Kane didnt want to sleep in the room so he sleep in the living room on the sofa instead. Hong Poh and Zhao Wen went on the swings while Edward and i were outside the house chatting and he was holing on to me sooo close that i felt that we were like a couple.

Edward also gave me a belated kiss on my right cheek and i really felt soooo close to him. At around 5 plus, Hong Poh and Zhao Wen decided to go to Prata House and have breakfast and they asked us first but we told them that we will come later.

Half an hour later, we decided to go and meet Hong Poh and Zhao Wen and we met them halfway and i was asking Hong Poh whether he could lend me some money fisrt and Hong Poh was sooo sweet and gave me money. Hong Poh also said that he was at the Prata House at 5:45am and when we met each other was 6:22am and what were Edward and i doing? I said that we didnt do anything and that we were only chatting.

Hong Poh didnt want to play gooseberry so Edward and i only went to 7-11 and only i bought a drink coz both of us werent hungry. We were back fast and before going into the house, i got a hug from him and i like it!!!

Hong Poh, Edward and i sat on the other sofa and chatted in the dark while Zhao Wen was at the swings alone lisening to her music. We chatted till 7:45am, Hong Poh went to join Zhao Wen at the swings while Edward and i remain at the balcony and spent some time together.

At around 8am, Edward was feeling a little hungry while i was a little tired so i went to the sofa and lay down and Edward came and join me and i lay on him instead. Laying on him was pretty nice and i one time i heard his heatbeat which was really nice. I love it soooo much that i wish that time would just stop there and not move on..

At 9am, i woke up.. Didnt really got a good sleep. Was jsut resting my eyes. Pipit, Edward, Zhao Wen and i left at 10am coz we had a noon class and i went to Pipit place to shower instead. Pipit place is really nice and her swimming pool is like you feel like jumping in..

Me, Edward & Darren

Me, Edward, Darren & Pipit

Darren kissing Edward and it look like i was also kissing him too

Me, Edward & Darren

Darren & Pipit

Me & Darren

Me & Pipit

Edward & Pipit

Me & Edward

This is pretty cute!!!

*cheese*

OMG!!!! Darren kissing Edward AGAIN!!!

Me & Pipit taken at her place

Mount Faber

2009-02-01T14:11:00.015+08:00

Random pics

2009-02-01T13:28:00.011+08:00

following a mat salleh @ mustafa

2009-02-01T12:42:00.004+08:00

The mat salleh guy said that i was cute..
hehe!!!

23 Jan 2009!!!!

2009-01-27T23:08:00.010+08:00

My 2nd birthday cake from my family!!!

The 1st birthday cake from my cell group friends, E316!!!!

The presents ireceived from friends and my sis!!!
The big brown bear is from Mabel, my BFF
The yellow bear is from Yililng, my good friend
The chef bear is from my Shatec friends, Pipit, Annie, Jiali & Ai Li
The book of desserts is from my sis
The necklace is also from my sis
The lip balm by Ben & Jerry is from Ai Li
The GUESS purse is from my cell group friends, E316!!!
Love them all, including the presents i received!!!!

What i did at IS for the past week!!!

2009-01-27T23:03:00.005+08:00

Quiche

Almond pie

What i did during IS - 20 Jan 2009

2009-01-21T20:35:00.003+08:00

Apple Pie

Fruit tart

What is happening from 12 Jan to 18 Jan

2009-01-18T19:10:00.002+08:00

I just started first day of school!!! I was very nervous and had like sweaty palms on my orientation but first day of school was pretty ok. Still had the nervous feeling but i made new friends and i glad i did.

My different subject mentors were ok. Surprisingly, we had to learn English which has always been my fave subject since primary school. English mentor, Benny is not bad. Very nice person and i could understand what he is saying.

Food mentor, Kelvin is also another good one. But he speaks a little soft and also some of things he is not very sure but i find him pretty interesting. Cathering Science mentor, Ms Anvie is very nice. Baking Mentor, Miss Goh is ok. I dont really say that i dont like her but i feel that i dont know why i dont really like here like the other mentors but i like her baking class alot! The way she teaches us is good and she makes good food too!

First day of baking was on thursday and i cut my little finger on my right hand and the blood was ozing out so much that it didnt stop bleeding and i had to like change the plaster on my little finger 5 times!!! 5 TIMES!!! Its alot!! with some help from some friends and the friends i made, they are really good.

The next day, they were like asking, how is your finger and whether i went to see the doctor. They were really very concern for me and i felt very touched and blessed that i have friends like them. Thanks Lord!!!

We made Pastry Cream, Custrad Sauce (Vanilla), Apple Pie Filling, Quiche Fillings and Melba Sauce. I didnt brought it home coz i didnt bring containers so i ate some and there the rest. On the second day of baking class, we made Sweet Paste, Short Paste (Savoury)and Quiche Sauce. We didnt have much time to make the Instance Cream Custrad coz we alrady exceeded our time and the next class were waiting outside.

The Quiche was really nice and i made 3 of it and brought home to let my family members try. I also had classes on saturdays and after class, i went for Cell Group. I really had fun at CG and i miss them alot!!! That was one of those days that i felt that i really had fun and i dont have to think about anything.

They celebrated my birthday too which i didnt expect them too. Thanks Kailing for the wonderful speech and thanks myu cell group memebers for the present that i never expect to get from all of you. I was really shocked and i just couldnt believe it!!! They gave me a GUESS purse and its original too!!! I never expect to have ANY branded stuff. I dont really go for branded stuff but this gift was REALLY WAY TOO OVER!!! This is how much i really meant to them!!! Yiling gave me another personal girt and its a CARE BEAR, yellow in colour with a smile on it!!!

THANK YOU LORD FOR OF THIS!!!

Today, i made some Sweet Paste, Apple Pie Filling and Pastry Cream at home and i cut my thumb also on my right hand. Its really more painful that the little finger and i dont know why i keep cutting myself!!!

I REALLY WANT TO THANK LORD FOR A GREAT WEEK!!!
Tash

p.s. pics of my birthday will be up soon!!!

First to the hair salon then to the tattoo conventation

2009-01-10T11:06:00.046+08:00

Poporazzi pic

Dont you think that Melissa hair has mis of colours which is actually very nice!!!!!

I find this very interesting, Melissa said that it was a traditional way of doing the tattoo.

This tattoo reminds me of someone having this tattoo on his body

This is the someone body.
Dont you think it looks alike, maybe different colours??

Melissa & Chris Garver!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tash & Chris Garver!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This pics i stole it from Tanja & Iqbal photo album.
Sorry about that ya.
I really like some of the photos coz i find it that its very well taken.

I seriously like this poster, with the fish and colours and everything..

Singapore Tattoo Show 09

2009-01-09T23:07:00.022+08:00

An enduring craze, the Asian art of tattooing has been around for thousands of years. Once seen as a badge of pride worn by gangsters, they have today evolved into body art flaunted by models and celebrities. This weekend, over 5,000 admirers and practitioners of the craft will converge at the Singapore Expo for the Singapore Tattoo Show . The three-day event - the Republic's first dedicated to the craft promises lots of ink action from both regional and international artists, including Chris Garver of 'Miami Ink' fame.

Local tattoo fans would be familiar with Chris Garver, who stars in the popular reality TV series Miami Ink. One of the biggest names in the tattoo world, Garver started experimenting with tattooing at the age of 17 and later moved to New York later to pursue a professional career in the craft. A renowned globe-trotter, he has tattooed clients in Asia, both Americas, and throughout Europe.

A Chris Garver tattoo

A signature Chris Garver arm tattoo

A Garver hibiscus for the ladies

Garver goes Oriental in this one

Detroit-born Bob Tyrrell's talent for tattoos inspired by black and grey realism is one that most artists can only dream of. Despite starting his career only in his early 30s, he has earned the respect of other professionals in the craft and pickup up many international awards along the way.

A typical Bob tyrell arm tattoo

Black and grey realism at its best

One of Bob Tyrell back masterpieces

Another legendary figure in the industry, Paul Booth has been captivating fans and artists alike with his skills as both a tattooer and a fine artist for over a decade. He has been credited as an influence for countless artists in his use of black and grey and pushing the boundaries of artistic development in the tattooing field.

One of Paul Booth's artwork from his "Night Gallery" series

A painful sacrifice for art, at this Paul Booth design implies

One in memory of Halloween

The three-day show also features a considerable number of Asian tattoo artists, such as 28-year-old Beijing native Yang Zhuo.

Yang Zhou bright-inked arm designs

wearing it on the chest

Oriental mystique

More pics coming soon!!!
Tash

I Believe In You - Tyler Hilton

2008-12-01T18:42:00.001+08:00

Its Tyler Hilton - I Believe In You
Its really a nice video and im sooo in love with the song and the way he did the video..

Bad feeling

2008-12-01T00:59:00.003+08:00

I have been having this bad feeling for days and i think there`s 2 reason to it..

1) Firstly, i think it my relationship with my boyfriend.. i dont know what`s going on with him but everytime he gets drunk, he either call or message nonscense stuff to me and i just dont really like it at all..

Not only that, but i feel i dont know whether i still can commit to this relationship.. Sometimes, i dont know whatever he said, izzit true or just he wants to make me happy.. And he`s already talking about marriage.. i really dont know..

2) Secondly, my family.. what does family mean to me.. It means coming back to somewhere you feel home, safe and you want to come back.. But i dont feel it anymore.. I just dont.. Everytime, after work, i dragged myself home and its for one thing only, SLEEP!! I dont feel that safe, and feeling to go home anymore..

Family do mean alot to me but this family, my family, i dont know where is that feeling.. I envy seeing other people family so close, safe and happy together.. WHY???

WHAT???
IS
HAPPENNING
TO
ME??

WHY??

God`s Love is Uncoditional

2008-11-28T19:43:00.003+08:00

Henri J M Nouwen says, “What can we say about God’s love? We can say that God’s love is unconditional. God does not say, ‘I love you, if. . . ‘ There are no ifs in God’s heart. God’s love for us does not depend on what we do or say, on our looks or intelligence, on our success or popularity. God’s love for us existed before we were born and will exist after we have died. God’s love is from eternity to eternity and is not bound to any time-related event or circumstance. Does that mean that God does not care what we do or say? No, because God’s love wouldn’t be real if God didn’t care. To love without condition does not mean to love without concern. God desires to enter into relationship with us and wants us to love God in return.

Let’s dare to enter into an intimate relationship with God without fear, trusting that we will receive love and always more love.” (Bread for the Journey, Feb 5)

However, we often feel unworthy of His love because we cannot live up to His standard. We feel we cannot please Him enough. We are not good enough. But God loves us not because of what we do. He loves us because He is Love. Love is who He is. God loves every one of us. So He sent His Son, Jesus Christ, to the world to reconcile us sinners with Him. By His grace anyone who believes in Jesus is put right with Him and has life more abundantly here and now.

Thus Henri Nouwen says, “Jesus came to us to help us overcome our fear of God. As long as we are afraid of God, we cannot love God. Love means intimacy, closeness, mutual vulnerability, and a deep sense of safety. But all of those are impossible as long as there is fear. Fear creates suspicion, distance, defensiveness and insecurity.

The greatest block in the spiritual life is fear. Prayer, meditation, and education cannot come forth out of fear. God is perfect love, and as John the Evangelist writes, “Perfect love drives out fear.”(1 John 4:18) Jesus’ central message is that God loves us with an unconditional love and desires our love, free from all fear, in return.” (Bread for the Journey, Feb 29)

So, how can we be conscious that God loves us unconditionally and have the faith to believe it? We can help ourselves to be aware of God’s unconditional love when we focus our 5 senses wisely on God by:

1) Listening to what the Bible says when we read (eyes), reflect and verbally repeat out loud what the Bible tells us about God’s love such as:·

"God is love, and those who live in love live in union with God and God lives in union with them"(1 John 4:16 TEV). ·
“Whoever loves is a child of God and knows God.”(1 John 4:7 TEV)·
"Whoever does not love does not know God, for God is love"(1 John 4:8 TEV). ·
“For God loved the world so much that He gave His only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him may not die but have eternal life.” (John 3:16 TEV)·
"God has shown us how much He loves us--it was while we were still sinners that Christ died for us! By His blood we are now put right with God; how much more, then, will we be saved by Him from God's anger." (Romans 5:8-9 TEV)·
"God showed His love for us by sending His only Son into the world, so that we might have life through Him"(1 John 4:9 TEV).·
“I come that you might have life and have it more abundantly.” (John 10:10 NKJV)·
“He gave us His Son---will He not also freely give us all things?” (Romans 8:32 TEV) ·
“For I am certain nothing can separate us from His love: neither death nor life, neither angels nor other heavenly rulers or powers, neither the present nor the future, neither the world above nor the world below--there is nothing in all creation that will ever be able to separate us from the love of God which is ours through Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8:38-39 TEV)·
“For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.”(2 Timothy 1:7 NKJV)

Henri Nouwen says, “Listen to the book. By that I mean read the Bible; read books about the Bible, about the spiritual life, and the lives of “great” saints. I know you read a good deal; but a lot of what you read distracts you from the way that Jesus is showing you. The secondary school and university offer you little in the way of ‘spiritual reading.’ That’s why it’s very important for you to read regularly books which will help you in your spiritual life. Many people are brought to God through spiritual literature that they chance or choose to read. Augustine, Ignatius, Thomas Merton, and many others have been converted through the book. The challenge, however, is not to read a ‘spiritual’ book as a source of interesting information, but rather to listen to it as to a voice that addresses you directly. It isn’t easy to let a text ‘read’ you. Your thirst for knowledge and information often makes you desire to own the word, instead of letting the word own you. Even so, you will learn the most by listening carefully to the Word that seeks admission to your heart.” (Letters to Marc about Jesus, 83)

2) Listening to the Church by attending Church regularly and listening (ears) to the sermons and homilies of the priests, pastors and elders.

Henri Nouwen says, “Listen to the church. I know that isn’t a popular bit of advice at a time and in a country where the church is often seen more as an obstacle in the way than as the way to Jesus. Nevertheless, I am deeply convinced that the greatest spiritual danger for our times is the separation of Jesus from the church. The church is the body of the Lord. Without Jesus there can he no church; and without the church we cannot stay united with Jesus. I’ve yet to meet anyone who has come closer to Jesus by forsaking the church. TO listen to the church is to listen to the Lord of the church. Specifically, this entails taking part in the church’s liturgical life. Advent, Christmas, Lent, Easter, Ascension, and Pentecost: these seasons and feasts teach you to know Jesus better and better and unite you more and more intimately with the divine life he offers you in the church.

The Eucharist is the heart of the church’s life. It’s there that you hear the life-giving gospel and receive the gifts that sustain that life within you. The best assurance that you’ll go on listening to the church is your regular participation in the Eucharist.” (Letters to Marc about Jesus, 83)

3) Listening to ourselves singing (mouth) praises to the Lord and having fellowship (communicate) with other Christians. We need to sing especially when we are troubled and weighed down. The singing will uplift our spirit for it is in worshipping God that we feel God’s presence. In His presence, our burden becomes light.

Stormie Omartian says, “One of the most powerful things you can do when you are being weighed down with negative thoughts and emotions is to sing songs of worship to the Lord. I know that may be the last thing you feel like doing. It’s hard to open up your mouth and sing when your heart is heavy. But that is exactly what you need to do. And it is the most crucial time to do it.

Remember, you don’t have to have a perfect heart in order to come to Him in praise. And you don’t have to have a perfect voice either. If that were true, how many people could come to Him? The great thing about the hidden power of praise is that God can purify your heart in the very process of you praising Him. And He can make you forget about your voice too. Your voice will come from a deeper place than your body, or even your soul. It will come from your spirit. It will be inspired and sustained by the Spirit of God in you. And it will be beautiful.

Negative emotions are never God’s will for you. Knowing that is half the battle. Praise and worship is one of your greatest weapons against them.” (The Prayer that changes Everything, 179-180)

4) Listening to God in our prayer (heart). Make use of our interior and exterior silence to listen to God speaking to us.

Henri Nouwen says, “Listen to your heart. It’s there that Jesus speaks most intimately to you. Praying is first and foremost listening to Jesus, who dwells in the very depths of your heart. He doesn’t shout. He doesn’t thrust himself upon you. His voice is an unassuming voice, very nearly a whisper, the voice of a gentle love. Whatever von do with your life, go on listening to the voice of Jesus in your heart. This listening must be an active and very attentive listening, for in our restless and noisy world Jesus’ loving voice is easily drowned out. You need to set aside some time every day for this active listening to Jesus, if only for ten minutes. Ten minutes each day for Jesus alone can bring about a radical change in your life.

You’ll find that it isn’t easy to be still for ten minutes at a time. You’ll discover straightaway that many other voices--voices that are very noisy and distracting, voices which are not God’s-- demand your attention. But if you stick to your daily prayer time, then slowly but surely you’ll come to hear the gentle voice of love and will long more and more to listen to it.” (Letters to Marc about Jesus, 84)

Mother Teresa says: “It is difficult to pray if you don’t know how to pray, but we must help ourselves to pray. The first means to use is silence. We cannot put ourselves directly in the presence of God if we do not practice internal and external silence. Therefore we shall take as a special point silence of mind, eyes, and tongue." (A Life for God, 21)

“To make possible true interior silence, we shall practice:·
Silence of the eyes, by seeking always the beauty and goodness of God everywhere, closing them to the faults of others and to all that is sinful and disturbing to the soul;·

Silence of the ears, by listening always to the voice of God and to the cry of the poor and the needy, closing them to all other voices that come from the evil one or from fallen human nature: e.g., gossip, tale-bearing, and uncharitable words;·

Silence of the tongue, by praising God and speaking the life-giving Word of God that is the Truth that enlightens and inspires, brings peace, hope, and joy, and by refraining from self-defense and every word that causes darkness, turmoil, pain, and death;·

Silence of the mind, by opening it to the truth and knowledge of God in prayer and contemplation, like Mary who pondered the marvels of the Lord in her heart, and by closing it to all untruths, distractions, destructive thoughts, rash judgment, false suspicions of others, revengeful thoughts, and desires;·

Silence of the heart, by loving God with our whole heart, soul, mind, and strength and one another as God loves, desiring God alone and avoiding all selfishness, hatred, envy, jealousy, and greed.” (A Life for God, 24)

“To foster and maintain a prayerful atmosphere of exterior silence we shall:·
respect certain times and places of more strict silence;·
move about and work prayerfully, quietly, and gently;·
avoid at all costs all unnecessary speaking and notice;·
speak, when we have to, softly, gently, saying just what is necessary;·
look forward to profound silence as a holy and precious time, a withdrawal into the living silence of God.” (A Life for God, 25)

5) Listening to our memories (mind) by jotting in a note book the little and major things God has done for us, such as:·

Through the kindness of a stranger. ·
Through the curious question of a child. ·
Through a word well spoken or a touch well timed.·
Through the commitment of a spouse·
Through the thoughtfulness of our friends ·
Through a book that inspires us·
Through the consideration of someone·
Through the support of family and friends in our major sickness·
Through the majesty of a sunset.·
Through the blessings of our friends·
Through the help from unexpected sources·
Through the comfort of words spoken in love·
Through the removal of anger, hate and bitterness in our hearts·
Through the reduction of envy and suspicion in our attitude·
Through the consolation we receive in pain or adversity·
Through compassion we receive·
Through the praises we receive from our loved one ·
Through the many encouragements we get.

Joyce Meyer says, “Keep a diary, a book of remembrance, of special things that God does for you. Include little things as well as major things. Read over your list at least once a week and you will be encouraged.” (Beauty for Ashes, 46)

When we use our eyes, ears, mouth, heart and mind to concentrate on God, we help ourselves to become aware of His living presence. In His living presence we become conscious of His unconditional love for us. This knowledge and acceptance of God’s unconditional love will build and strengthen our faith. It also gives us the courage to live our lives loving and serving God and others.

Reflections of a Skyline

2008-11-25T22:58:00.001+08:00

Reflections of a Skyline. About two people in love, with so much to say, yet unable to say. Two vulnerable shells, united by only Love.

So beautiful.

A day out with Mazanah

2008-11-25T22:52:00.014+08:00

without smile

with smile

the pic is dark but the lights were really nice

Tash: Nice bod
Mazanah: yeah, if i show my husband this pic, he comfirm jealous
Tash: *laughs*

her reflection is really nice..
i took it.. haha..

My reflection is smiling at someone..
haha..

Had a great day!!

Yishun Cleaning

2008-11-20T11:04:00.015+08:00

Aunty Seeto birthday party

2008-11-20T10:13:00.014+08:00

These pics are REALLY interesting!!!

2008-10-20T00:26:00.015+08:00

Actually, I cheated. Check out this site, www.photofunia.com
It's really interesting!

Take Care
Tash

Thanking

2008-10-20T00:17:00.004+08:00

I would like to thank some of my friends who have helped me in sme words of encouragment after my break up with Jesse. Here are the 4 friends who i would thanked first coz without them, i wouldnt know what to do. They are Mabel (my BFF and also my collegue), Yiling (my cell group friend and also a close friend), Rose (one cashier whom i am close with and also working in Perfume & Cosmetic) and Kailin ( my cell group friend and also a close friend).

Other friends who also has helped are, Andrew (my night class friend), Visa ( a friend whom i met coz i love his bands songs and also from a band called Armchair Critic), Mazlinah (my good friend and my collegue) and Mazanah (my good friend and my collegue).

I didn't really tell alot of people about it coz some of them didnt know that i was in a relationship and some of them didn't know much about him.

Thank you all sooooooooo much and i really appreaciate it ALOT!!!
Take Care
Tash

Is it wrong to love someone?

2008-10-15T01:49:00.004+08:00

Guess what? Jesse and I broke up and i know it's pretty shocking coz it's still is a shock to me.

He messaged me at around 6:20pm, yesterday 14/10/2008 saying:
Hey tash. Its so so so hard for me ask you to do this. i know you will be upset. And that makes me feel very upset. I want to ask if we can be friends? A relatioship is just too hard to maintain at the moment. Dont be upset becasue im still here for you and im not going anywhere. You have done nothing wrong at all. I promise. And i still love you. But lets just calm it down a bit so its not so hard being away from each other? Please understand. I know you do. Xxx

When i read the message, i had this feeling that something was wrong and i have no idea what was it and my heart sank. My mind was full of questions and it's like i dont know whether i want to know the answers or not. I just dare not ask.

Then he messaged me again saying:
I feel sick because i know youre upset. Please dont be. Im still here. Not going anywhere.

I didnt reply coz i didnt know what to say. I was lost of words. I was like thinking that maybe it's God that is punishing me coz i did something wrong on Monday. I stole a necklace from a shop even though i knew i had money but it was like after soooooooooo loooooooooong then i did something like that.

I went to facebook to message him:
Are you going to change your relationship status?

He replied back saying:
are you upset tash? please tell me how you feel.

Then I said:
I am upset. When i read the message, my heart sank.. I really felt pain, like strong pain but i understand if you wanted to remain as friends. i respect your decision.

I dont blame you or angry with you. I will still want to talk to you even though we are friends but my mind is still in whirl, thinking why the sudden change. Lost of question going through my mind right now. I may not look sad on the outside but inside, my heart is crying.

Then he said:
tash im sorry. i just cannot keep going on knowing that every time i say im coming i dont and im constantly going out to mines and cant contact you. i just know one day you will realise that a relationship has to have what we have but it has to be more. you need someone who can be there always. i cant. im doing this because i dont want to hurt you in the long run, i want to do it because i want you to be happy. that one day you will know this is for the better. i know how you feel. trust me. please trust me when i say i know. because ive had this 4 times before. im so sorry to make you sad. but im here for you whenever you need to talk or ask me anything. i promise that. you are still very special to me and i have been very upset as well. im not good at this....i am sorry.

Then i said:
So this is really a break up?

Then he said:
yes. im sorry tash. you will be ok, i promise you will stop being sad very soon, just be you. you are very special and you need to make a few decisions for youself because you can do anything you want to do in your life. im still around. i promise.

Then i said:
Jesse, i am really sorry that you have to get to know me but i was happy that i knew you and even love you..

I really wish that this was all a dream but i know that i am living in reality and not in dreams. I will still want you as a friend just to let you know that tomorrow is our 7 months of knowing each other..

Our 7 months friendship, not anniversary. So if you are going to change your relatioship status, i wont mind and i really hope that our friendship will not end here but carry on..

Then he said:
we will be friends! we will be very good friends! im not going to stop being your friend i promise. i have to sleep i have training in the morning. have a great night tash, and happy 7 months tash. have a lovely day. please dont be sad. im always here. youve still got my phone number. i still exist and i will for a long long time.

After all this, my mind is still in whirl mood and i am still upset.. I talked to Yiling, my cell group friend coz she saw my msn message, 'Is it wrong to love someone?' She did made me feel better a little and made me laugh which i didnt think i would do after a break up.

She told me alot of stuff which made me understand and the word LOVE is pretty complicated but nice feeling. She also said that i shouldnt blame God coz he were to punish you, you wouldnt be here right now. God loves you and He wouldnt punish you but will forgive you and pray that you wont do it again PLUS you knew that it was wrong so he will forgive you.

I know that a long distance relationship is VERY hard especially when you are in love with this person and you dont to see this person so often like normal couples do. I have heard of alot of long distance relationships and most of them broke up and i didnt expect that it would happen to me.

---------------------------------------------pause----------------------------------------------

It's 2:36am in the early wee hours and i still haven sleep coz i cant sleep. I am still thinking, crying, listening to music. There's still pain in my heart but i hope that i will get better. I still love him and it remains in a VERY special place in me. There's one thing that im glad is that, we remain as friends and i hope that my friendship with him will last forever.

If you have any comment or has something to say, do leave on my tag board. I would like to see what you have to say.

Take Care
Tash

F1 Pictures

2008-10-12T16:13:00.041+08:00

Hugs & Kiss (xoxo)

2008-10-08T16:27:00.009+08:00

Daredevil Blaine hangs upside down over New York

2008-10-07T23:49:00.001+08:00

Illusionist and daredevil David Blaine began a nearly three-day stint Monday hanging upside down over New York's Central Park, in what may be his toughest stunt yet.

Illusionist and daredevil David Blaine began a nearly three-day stint Monday hanging upside down over New York's Central Park, in what may be his toughest stunt yet.

Blaine, 35, was hoisted by his heels over the park's Wollmann ice rink, and was to stay there, dangling for 60 hours from a wire, until late Wednesday.

The magician, who has previously spent 72 hours encased in ice, 44 days without food in a plexiglass box, a week under water, and been buried alive, told AFP that being inverted for three days was his hardest challenge.

"This is the most difficult for sure. The others, you could get into them soon after the start, but this one is tough from the get-go," Blaine said after being lowered to head level for an interview. Dressed in black T-shirt and grey trousers, the short, tanned and bearded magician looked at ease as he surveyed New York from the unusual angle.

He was attached at the torso and at two steel clips linking his boots to the wire. For two nights and three hot early autumn days he will neither eat or sleep.

The trick echoes Blaine's great hero Harry Houdini, the legendary escapologist of the late 19th and early 20th century, who amazed New York crowds by hanging upside down from skyscrapers and cranes.

Unlike Houdini, who would hang in a straightjacket, then escape after a short time, Blaine aims instead to prove his powers of endurance. In training, he tried the trick for just six hours.

"Sixty hours -- that will be heading into the unknown," he told AFP in a quiet voice. Asked how he would manage the challenge, Blaine answered: "Sheer willpower."

The metal frame from which he is suspended is four floors high, but Blaine can be lowered to talk face to face -- even if upside down -- with tourists and curious New Yorkers.

Mary Foti, 72, who stopped by while walking her dachshund Madison, applauded the adventure. "I think it's wonderful. It gives you something to talk about other than politics," she said. "I don't think he's crazy.

I live in New York and you see all sorts of things, especially in the park!" Doctors have expressed concern about the effect of the stress on Blaine's internal organs and blood circulation. He is not eating, but is taking liquid through a straw, and is able to urinate through a catheter.

He regularly frees one leg, so that he is hanging only by the other, then uses that limb to help rebalance, briefly raising his head a little nearer to a horizontal position.

Blaine is well known for his card tricks and other illusions, including transforming a homeless man's cup of coffee into one overflowing coins, and appearing to have magically removed a distraught-looking woman's front teeth.

However, he has become more famous for his physical dares, which combine Houdini-era tricks with modern public relations.

ABC television bought live coverage rights to the Central Park event and is planning a two-hour prime time show on Wednesday at 9:00 pm (0100 GMT Thursday) featuring Blaine's tricks and then his descent from the wire.

Longtime publicity agent Regina Dantas said she and the rest of Blaine's team were worried every time he took his stunts to the edge. "The doctor, his assistant, these guys are petrified. The outcome is always a big question mark, a big question mark," she told AFP. Blaine, she said, "is fearless. Death, I think, means something different to him."

Not everyone was impressed. "I'm not bothered really. Perhaps it's our age group, but I don't see why people have to do things like that," an elderly English tourist, visiting New York with her husband. "Poor man," she added, hooting with laughter.

Meanwhile, one of the score of security guards at the site sounded as if the job was going to be a feat of endurance for him too. "I'm getting tired just watching him," he said, shaking his head.

Up to 40 injured in Qantas mid-air jet incident

2008-10-07T23:37:00.002+08:00

Up to 40 passengers and crew were injured, some suffering broken bones and cuts, when a Qantas jetliner suddenly changed altitude on Tuesday, Australian police and the airline said.

The Airbus A330-300 made an emergency landing at an airfield near the Western Australian town of Exmouth after making a mayday call when the mid-air drama struck during a flight from Singapore to Perth.

"A number of passengers and crew sustained injuries, including fractures and lacerations, on board QF72 this afternoon en route from Singapore to Perth following a sudden change in altitude," the Australian flag carrier said.

Emergency services and medical staff were on standby at the Learmonth air base, which lies about 1,100 kilometres (680 miles) northeast of the state capital of Perth, said Sergeant Greg Lambert of the West Australian Police.

"It is understood up to 40 people were injured during a mid-air incident," he said.
The Australian Transport Safety Bureau (ATSB) said early reports indicated that around 30 passengers and crew had been hurt, 15 of them sustaining serious injuries, including broken bones and lacerations.

"While cruising in level flight, the aircraft experienced a sudden in-flight upset, resulting in injuries to a number of cabin crew and passengers, primarily in the rear of the aircraft," the bureau said in a statement.

"The crew declared a mayday and diverted the aircraft to Learmonth ... where it landed without further incident," it said, adding that it was launching an immediate investigation.

Qantas could not confirm the number of injured nor whether the aircraft dropped or rose suddenly in altitude. An emergency services worker said paramedics had boarded the Qantas aircraft and were tending to the injured after it touched down at around 1:35 pm (0535 GMT).
Emergency vehicles and ambulances surrounded the aircraft after it came to a halt, eyewitnesses said.

Qantas, which has long boasted a reputation of being one of the world's safest airlines, has suffered a spate of incidents in recent months that have tarnished its safety record.
In July, an exploding oxygen bottle punched a huge hole in the side of a Qantas Boeing 747-400, forcing an emergency landing in the Philippines. No passengers were injured in the mid-air drama.

The hole was ripped in the fuselage of the plane, which was carrying 365 people, as it cruised at 29,000 feet (8,800 metres) en route from Hong Kong to Australia.

Australian air safety investigators in August announced a safety review of Qantas after two other incidents occurred involving its aircraft within two weeks.

On July 28, a Qantas Boeing 737-800 returned to Adelaide after a landing gear door failed to retract. In early August a Boeing 767 bound for Manila turned back to Sydney after developing a hydraulic fluid leak.

But the aviation watchdog, the Civil Aviation Safety Authority (CASA), said that despite the review there was no evidence to suggest any links between three mid-air emergencies on Qantas flights.

Jesse Talbot - harvey

2008-10-04T15:28:00.002+08:00

6 months and 4 days ago, Jesse and i knew each other on Facebook, an application called Zoosk. He messaged me and we just chatting with each other. 1 month ago, we got into a cyber relationship. We have never met each other in person before but we seem to have feelings for each other thanks to lots of smsing and msning. We also email each other and sometimes talk on the phone.

I seriously didnt expect all this to happen.. I didnt expect that an aussie guy will like me, i would definetly fall for him coz he's cute but i didnt expect that he would fall for me.. I really wanna thanked God to have given me this opportunity to have known this guy.

The shocking part is that we have not met each other but he have fallen in love with me and he understands me.. The best part is that he's willing to come down here just to meet me and i cant think of anyone who would do that for me except for Marcel who is attached to my sis. But other than that, i cant think of anyone..

Knowing him is like the BEST thing in the world coz he made me happier and he changed the way i looked into life.. Some of you who knows me, will always hear me saying that my life really sucks and i always wish that i could rewind back into the past but it will never happen. He made me love life and learn to appreaciate things around me and even love him too..

You know he's the only person who knows everything about me besides my sis.. I cant imagine if i lose him.. Seriously, thank you God for this!

This guy is none other than Jesse Talbot - harvey!

Recently, we played a game called Questions and Answers. This game is about asking each other questions. You can choose to ask the same question or a different on and answer them with honesty. This game also helps you understands your partner better.

Question: If you had a chance to bring someone on a dersert island, who would you bring and why?

Answer: You! Because i love you and you love me.

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Question: Did you ever actually see yourself travel to Australia? Will you ever come back to Australia, in the future?

Answer: Of course, i did.

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Question: How far do you think we will go in our relationship? Be honest.

Answer: From what i see is that i think we will go far if we keep on trusting each other.

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Question: How do you convienve my parents if you knew that they disapprove of our relationship?

Answer: I would have to let them see me treating you as a very very good friend with respect and looking after you the way they would want a man to treat their daughter. I would have to earn their trust.

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Question: What would you say and do if i cheated on you?

Answer: I would just stop talking to you.

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Question: Have you and would you leave me for him if someone better than showed up?

Answer: No, never! My heart has only place for one person and that person is you.

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Question: What are your exact boundaries for this relationship?

Answer: I wouldnt say that there must be exact but the one thing that i would say that i wouldnt want my parents to know about this relatioship yet.

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Question: Is sex very impertant to you in a relatioship?

Answer: If you had asked me that 6 months ago, I would have said that i wouldnt have a girlfriend who i cannot have sex with. Now i would say i would like it but its not the most imprtant thing anymore.

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Question: What is the most important thing?

Answer: Love. Trust, and Honesty. i still believe that sex is a major part of a mature relatioship but not ours by the looks of things.

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Question: What do your brother and sister think about me and you? Honest as possible

Answer: My brother doesnt know much about it whereas my sis knows that i like you as i always talk to her about you.

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Question: Do you think we could one day convience your parents?

Answer: I hope too, one day but to be honest, it will be hard and i would need you to be there in case i breakdown.

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Question: If i died, would you go to my funeral?

Answer: I seriously cant believe you ask that question. I just dont like the word 'died'. It just reminds me of alot of things. Can i choose not to answer that question?

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Question: Ok, better question. If i smoked pipe. Like those old guys do or cigars and we were married happily and i am always smoking cigars indoors, what would you say to me about it?

Answer: I would ask you quit or maybe you could do it like twice a week. Do you do that now?

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Question: If you were given 5 words to describe your girlfriend, what would they be?

Answer: No, i dont do that. Loving. Gorgeous. Cute. Funny and....... Gorgeous.

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Question: If we were living in a house and we were old and i was grumpty old cigar smoker and spent my days sitting outside reading books, what would you say?

Answer: I would stop you from reading your book and spent sometime with me instead! Are you a grumpty person?

Not at all, i love you so much!

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Question: When i am in my most vulnerable moment, would you take advantage of me?

Answer: Wow, no. Are you about about that? I wouldnt take advantage of you ever.

Yea, I guess coz when someone is in their vulnerable moment, they need the love and support from someone they trust alot and who knows maybe something might happen!

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Question: Would you take advantage of me? You must know that i would love it if you did? Haha!

Answer: I dont know. maybe i will when i am vulnerable.

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Question: Do you think that i would take advantage of you?

Answer: I dont know but what i know is that you respect me alot and wont right?

No i will not ever do anything to you that you haven't told me i can do.

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Question: Do you think i am attractive?

Answer: Of course. The first time you message me on facebook, i thought you were some ordinary ang moh who would just chat and disappear but i was wrong and i am glad you are not one of those.

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love tash

work part 2

2008-10-04T01:31:00.002+08:00

Later, i came back to work becasue i was during two shift and was the first packer to reach. Went to declare and saw Shu Goek and Afifah. When out and decided to packed for Vivian. While packing for her, saw Grayson and i couldnt believe it and i ask him how come he was here and he said that he was working full shift. I have to adimt that i was glad to see him.

Viivan told me something interesting and pretty shocking too. The shocking part was when we packer before we came to work, some of the runners had to help the cashier packed and i think that Grayson was helping Vivian coz that's what she told me and she said that his phone rang and he answered the phone infront of the customer and she didnt say anything coz it maybe somerhing important but he dont know is that he was not supposed to do that when you are in the shop floor but you know runners are used to it and less than 2 mins, he told Vivian that he had to go.

The interesting part was when you put the items in the ziplock back and put the receipt in it, you need not put a scotch tape on the receipt but he did that and also did it very nicely. I was like saying, maybe he used to using the tamper bag and that's why he used the scotch on the ziplock bag too. Haha!

Later, i saw Darren and he smiled at me very weirdly and i was thinking what the hell he smile at me like that. He then said, eh your scandal work today and that was why he smiled like that.

I was helping one of the conceirge to tear the price tag and Rei's customer came and paid at my counter and he said, it's ok, i will help you pack. Then he said, i heard that you sleep with someone and i was like WHAT? He said, at the BBQ and i said NO! Then he said that you guys were on the same bed together and i said, yes we were in the same bed but we didnt do anything ok! Now you also know later will be like the whole Nuance will know aobut it. The Rei smiled at me. Then Vivian say, eh i dont know le, later you tell me ar.

You must be thinking how Wendy knows about it huh? Ok, i will tell you. That time i went to put in 2 packages into the sup, SQ 231 and SQ255 and after i put the package, i was about to go out of the sup room when Wendy ask me, you and Grayson are together? I was like WHAT, NO! How did you know? Then she said, then you guys sleep together? I said, NO! How come you also know about? I couldnt believe that she knew about and i had alsways hoped that she wasthe last person or maybe not know about it.

Then we went out of the sup room and she said, then you guys were drunk? I said, no la, i wasnt. Then he dont know that you were there? Then i said, he wasnt drunk and was just high and he knew that i was there. We were just laying on the bed chatting and we didnt do anything. Then she said, with the room lights off? I said, Sayang off the room light. Then she said, so Sayang was sleeping in the middle? I said, i was laying in the middle but we didnt do anything ok? That was how Wendy know and she isnt the only one that is teasting me.

i will tell you more about my boyfriend, Jesse Talbot - harvey later in the late morning/afternoon or at night ya!

love tash
xxx

work

2008-10-03T01:41:00.002+08:00

This morning i had to work and when i reached, i opened the sup room door and i was pretty surprised to see, Grayson. I was thinking to myself since when he work morning shift today. Did care much, punch my card and went to declare. About to go out when i saw Masturah and Istiana and said hi to them and Grayson looked at me thinking why i didnt say hi to him.. Haha!

I saw Lay Hoon and decided to packed for her and she kept on complaining that she didnt like this team and that she was very stress. She said that her pervious ACC she can talk about whatever she want but this ACC is so much different. She didnt like the idea of that if you wanna go toilet, you have to call up the ACC first and when you want to go for short break, you have to punch card.

She just kept on complaining and wasnt happy about it but luckily there was me and some other sales staff who were there to cheer her up and she's glad to have me as her packer.

At about 6 plus she wanted to go to the toilet and so i too went too but i came back earlier than her and guess what? I saw Grayson packing for Tracy, counter #76 and i went to ask him, how come he was packing for her and he said that he was bored and there was nothing to do.

5 mins later, he walked pass the counter i was packing for and said he was fired. I laughed at him. At about 8 plus, i went in to put in some of the packages and saw all the runners plus Wendy in the sup room. Wendy did this eye thingy at me like telling me that Grayson was there and i was like, WHAT now she is also teasting me too. She said to Grayson in chinese to take the package from me and help me but i simply ignored her.

Went out of the sup room and i couldnt believe that Wendy is also like some of the runners. I still cant believe that she knew what happen. OMG!

Will tell you more later in the late morning.
Got to go coz my tv show is sarting in 3 mins!

love tash
xxx

Met Jean @ Dhouby Ghaut, then met Yiling @ Heeren, Nikki @ City Hall control station & Kailin on 25 Sept 2008

2008-10-02T00:52:00.043+08:00

BBQ on 24 Sept 2008 @ Aloha Changi

2008-10-01T19:07:00.002+08:00

This pictures were taken before Mabel left. She was supposed to say overnight but last minute she had some problems and so she left..

When we came back to the chalet, I was pretty shocked to see Kat there and i told Mabel and she asked me whether i wanted to say hi. At first, i was reluctant but when Mabel when to say hi to her, i just followed. They went to gamble in the room while Mabel and i went to eat with Mazanah and her 2 kids and Masturah and friends were there too.

When we finished our food, we went to watched the 9pm chinese drama and we heard alot of shouting and laughing and cheering in the room. When the chinese drama ended, they ended their part 1 of their game and Grayson came out and told me and Mabel not to just sit around and come and play with us instead. I said ok but we were only there to see first only later than decide whether to play or not and he said ok.

Kat came out of the room looked at her watch and saw that it was already 10pm and said that she wanted to go home already coz the next day she was working early flight. Wendy from the kitchen said, you already won so much money then want to go home. Most of the runners didnt want to let her go coz she won most of their money and told her to play another round and she said ok and will played for another hour.

We went in and Kat told us that they were playing In Between and she asked me and Mabel whether we know how to play and i said no and she thought us how play. After a few rounds, we decided to play but me and Mabel decided to share. We played for an hour and most of the rounds me and Mabel were winning but we were winning small money.

At about 12 plus, Kat went home and the second round she did lose some money. Mabel also had to leave too. I decided to stay overnight as i already told my dad that i will be staying overnight and it would be kind of wired if i did went home at that timing. Some of the runners went out to buy more alcohol and when they came home, Sayang, Jacintha, Chu Heng, Grayson and me decided to play cards since the others were playing majong.

We went into the room and played Indian Poker and we didnt use money to play but use drinks instead. I tell you, Grayson was like drinking the most and some more his drink was Martell mix with Green Tea and after a while, you could like see his face were all red. I didnt felt anything any kick at all.

After that, Chu Heng and Jacintha wanted to buy some sweets and some other stuff from cheers and they left. Sayang and Grayson went to lie on the bed, and it was wasnt those single kind of bed. It was like those in the master bedroom. Each took the both corners and i was still eating the Hot & Spicy potato chips and i just sat down on the bed.

Sayang said, tash come and lie in the centre la. I share half pillow with Sayang and the half with Grayson. We were laying down and also chatting and Jian Kia (golden hair) keep on coming in and out into the room and it was super irritating. Then he came and lie on the bed with us so me and Sayang had to move in a little to give him some space. I tell you, it was so squeezing and we just couldnt move.

Less than 5 mins, he was out of the bed and said it was boring and went out of the room and Sayang and i move back to our normal space. 5 mins later, we thought that it was Jian Kia and wanted to tell him off and we saw that It was Chu Heng and Jacintha and they told us that they were back and could continue the game.

Sayang went out of the room and it was only left with Grayson and me. He siad that he was feeling very cold and he think that he maybe having fever. I touched his forehead and i said, you are really having a fever. We just carry on chatting and after that i went to the toilet.

After i came out, i went to sit on the bed and tie up my hair coz i was feeling very warm. Grayson was still laying on the bed and he turn over, face down and then, Jacintha and Chu Heng came in and Jacintha said, did we disturb you guys? I said, no and Chu Heng and Jacintha started making this hu ha that we did something in the room and those who were playing majong came in.

Grayson and i kept on saying that nothing happen and we were just chatting only. Chu Heng said, Tash you betray Vicky and the others were saying to Grayson that he will have to answer to Vicky. Chu Heng took out his phone and took and pic of me and Jacintha took a pic of Grayson.

I was like do whatever you want. I just dont know what else to say. Chu Heng was saying to Jacintha that he would pass the pics to her thru msn and Jacintha will tag it on facebook. Then we decided to continue with our game, Indian Poker and we saw that Grayson couldnt give out the card properly and couldnt even sit. He said that he know what he's doing but his body isnt functioning that way he wanted it to be. We told him to go and sleep first then later at 6am we will wake him up coz later at 8am he still have to go to work.

The four of us played another game called 5, 10 and i tell you throughout the whole game, i just didnt know how it works and Chu Heng sabo me and i felt the kick after that. When i knew i reached my limit, i told Chu Heng that i was out and the 3 of them played for another 3 rounds and after that we went to relax outside.

At about 6 plus, we started clearing up the place and at 7 plus, Chu Heng sent me, Jacintha and Sayang home. When i reached home, i went to have my shower and still can check my facebook and my emails and only sleep at 9am but woke up at 10;30am and that 90 mins of sleep, my dreams had Grayson in it. At 11 plus in the morning, i was out again.

BBQ was fun and i wish there was more of it and maybe in the future Wendy will make it again.

Thanks Wendy for the wonderful and awesome BBQ!

Weekend hangout on 21 Sept 2008

2008-10-01T01:52:00.004+08:00

More pics coming soon!
love, tash

Family Outing on 31 Aug @ Terminal 2

2008-09-08T14:27:00.039+08:00

Kailin graduated from SOT

2008-08-28T11:43:00.023+08:00

Congratulations Kailin!

2008-08-27T17:13:00.002+08:00

Congratulations Kailin,

So HAPPY for you girl.. I'm really proud of you for what you have gone through for the past five months and will always be.. You have not only make an impact in my life but for others too and i'm really thankful to God to have such a friend. Continue to serve God and i'm behind you ALLL THE WAY!

Love
Tash